Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Old Faithful

See that?

It's my hairdryer.

My Sunbeam hairdryer.

Why is it getting special attention on this blog? Because it's been serving me and my hair needs for TWENTY-FIVE years! I got it as a birthday gift my freshman year in college. Thinking back on it, perhaps it was a strange gift. But no, it's got to be the best money spent for a small appliance ever.

Me and my Sunbeam have been through a lot together. And a lot of hair "styles-ish."

It's worked great and only recently needed that duct tape added.

My hairdryer makes me smile. It's truly earned it's name, Sunbeam.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Story of the Week

Actually, it will probably be story of the month. Or story of the season.

Look, it's just a good story, okay?

This is courtesy of Trina. However, the details have been scrambled - not to protect the innocent but because I don't remember what they are.

Some woman was dog-sitting for a co-worker. The co-worker warned the woman that the dog was very old and may die. If the dog did die while the co-worker was overseas, the woman was to take the body to the vet for cremation.

A sad scenario, but I applaud the dog owner for having a thought-out plan.

The dog did die. Fortunately, the woman knew what to do. Get the dog to the vet. Except the woman was in D.C. and had no car. Her choices were hailing a taxi with the dead dog or taking the Metro. While a taxi could still produce a good story, throw in public transportation into a dead dog story and you know you've got a winner.

Carefully the woman packed the rather sizeable dog in a duffle bag (probably a few layers of towels or blankets as well). She put the duffle bag under her seat and hoped for the best as she rode toward the vet's office.

Of all the times for a chatty, inquisitive stranger to make conversation.

"Whatcha got in the bag?"

The woman thought quickly and replied, "Oh, just some old computer parts."

The stranger seemed content with this answer. Until the next stop. At the next stop, the stranger grabbed the woman's duffle bag and ran out the door of the train.

Yes, the stranger stole the dead dog's body.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Flumping Friday

Fun Friday---you've heard about it, you've read the reports. Secretly (or not so secretly) you've had the jealousy.

But, there's something you need to understand about Fun Friday.

It can be a lot of pressure.

It starts around Wednesday with the nagging thought "What crazy hijinks will we come up with for this week?" Fun Friday activities have included things like making laundry detergent (a full report on that coming soon), shopping at Stites, going out to lunch, and, ice cream. Sometimes we go to the library.

You can understand the dilemma. How do you come up with things to do every week?

Thus, Flumping Friday. An Ode to Doing Nothing. Flumping is a word I learned from Lynne (let's not talk about the words she's learned from me.)

Essentially, Flumping means to do nothing but with the sole purpose of enjoying the nothingness. No guilt allowed. In fact, flumping is a fine art and I'm just a beginner.

It's after two o'clock and I'm still in my pajamas. I've been reading a trashy book. Next on the agenda (all subject to change depending on my slug-level) bathing, TV watching, and more surfing the internet. Oh wait...surfing sounds way too energetic. I'm getting worn out just thinking about it.

Wow... I was going to write more, but I'm exhausted.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

English is Confusing

English is my first, and only, language. I like to think I'm fairly adept in its use. They even let me teach others how to use English to write things like sentences and papers to convey important information.

Yet, I am still confused. For example, when a high school friend gets in touch after at least 10 years of no contact (and the smattering of contact in the 15 years before that was all initated by me...yes, more bitterness) and says "Would love to hear from you" I interpreted that to mean that after receiving (within 72 hours) my newsy update on myself and my family, she'd respond equally promptly. Nope. It's been about 6 weeks (not that I'm counting) and still nothing.

Instead of saying "Would love to hear from you" she should have told the truth. "I've had a couple glasses of wine. I'm feeling sort of nostalgic and lonely, so I thought I'd look up friends from a happier time. Once I sober up and get back to my very important life, I'll wish I hadn't sent this message at all."

But one word I do know and understand....Bitterness!

Friday, May 14, 2010

Desperately Seeking Syrup

This is Foster:

See how happy he is, totally engaged, wanting to play with that cool blue ball?

Now look at him:

Clearly, his focus has changed. He now has an unhealthy obsession with Mrs. Butterworth. This is understandable.

She's thick AND rich. Doubly delicious. Foster just can't stay away. Perhaps one day Foster will find happiness elsewhere. Until then, he will take his own sweet time...

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

I (heart) the BMV!

I do! I really, really do!

Last night, I woke up at 4 a.m. realizing I had not renewed my driver's license. I have no idea what it was that made me remember, nearly three weeks after my birthday, but it sure filled me with angst.

After showering and trying to look sort of put together for the big picture taking moment, I drove off to the local Bureau of Motor Vehicles.

The first great thing about this branch of the BMV is there was NO LINE! One guy was sitting waiting for his picture, so I sailed right up to the clerk and confessed my mistake. She was so nice about it, I was almost happy to pay the $20 fine (almost).

I slung my bag on the counter and found my checkbook. And that's when the magic happened. The clerk and another woman nearby totally loved my bag! And why?


Who doesn't love plarn?! I aced my eye exam, added an extra ten pounds to my weight (so now it's about accurate, as opposed to 4 years ago when I was more optimistic), added nothing to my height, and smiled for my picture. Sure, it took three tries for it to come out as hideous as it did, but now I'm all legal again.

And the new license is pink! How about that?

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Happy Mother's Day (2 days late)

It's celebrated in all kinds of ways, usually flowers, cards, jewelry, etc.

Ice cream.

What more could you want? And when you can't decide, go for the sampler. Featured here are: spouse like a house (Handel's take on chubby hubby), red sky at night (black raspberry ice cream with chocolate truffles), chocolate cheesecake chunk, and chocolate peanut butter brownie.

Party on.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Fun Friday

Each Friday, we try to do something fun (thus the name). Sometimes it's making homemade laundry detergent (oh yes we did) and sometimes it's just sitting around reading (which is Super Deluxe Fun Friday).

This week, we had Fun Friday Eve (also known as "Thursday Night"). Trina and her son made their way to visit the Gold Coast (actually it was to visit the local college campus but that doesn't sound as enticing). We had a crockpot dinner of fajitas (you know how we feel about the crockpot) and Ty was in a fishing frenzy until we lured (haha) him away with food. Liz and Pat joined us so it turned into quite the little party, complete with Liz doing a spit gag with beer (I'm only saying that because her one daughter reads the blog - hi Hannah!).

Sue flew to the coast for her Fun Friday in Jersey. We missed her, but there's no holding back Fun Friday at Ground Zero. Pat, Trina, Ty and I went to the local scratch and dent grocery store for treasures.

It did not disappoint.

There was an advertised sale (like everything there isn't cheap enough) for soda, so Trina loaded up. There were giant greeting cards on sale for .99 - giant as in 3x2 - complete with giant envelopes. And while we all agreed that past expiration date mayo is a bad idea (there are just some things you want new), misc. finds such as hair scrunchies, little dippers and pizza shells abounded.

Then Pat found something amazing. Not unlike a Big Foot Sighting, there was a bin full of candy cigarettes! Yes, the kind that shoots out powdered sugar when you take a puff!! I didn't even know they sold them anymore. But there they were. Were. Pat bought them out. I'm not sure what her plans for them are. She's a pharmacist after all, so it could be a health concern that she wanted to abolish the entire stock. Or, maybe she plans to utilize them in a pork rind diorama.

We'll keep you posted.